Lovely Friend,I cannot express the depth to which I have learned about myself through trying to change my health. It really quite amazes me that so many parts of my life are so interconnected and woven together. This may seem odd that your health could be so tied to other parts of your life, but for me, it truly is. I have realized how much my health is tied to my spiritual, social, and emotional self.
My physical health is tied to my spiritual health more than I ever realized that it could be. This past year I have been home with my daughter and have slowed down enough to hear the still small voice of the Lord. My car is the place where He speaks to me the most and often brings verses to me in a way that I have not understood it before. The initial verse that God brought to me was "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." He reminded me that serving Him takes place in EVERY area of my life, including what I eat. Another way that I have learned about my spiritual health through food is when I have chosen to sin with it. Now, I want to say that I do not believe that eating fast food is sinning. But in this particular situation, it became a sin for me. One night, I really was very tired and didn't feel like cooking. I entertained the idea of driving through for a burger, although I knew that we really were saving that money for other expenses and it was not the appropriate health choice for me. I ordered my meal and way overate, to the point where I ate mine and my husband's meal. This is hard for me to admit that this even happened because it is not the norm for me at all. I questioned, "Why when I could be satisfied with one meal, would I eat two meals?" Digging deeper and being aware of my surroundings made me tune in to what happened. First, I ate so much because I opened the can of worms called "craving" and overate because I craved the food. I ate so fast and devoured the food before I had time to rate my fullness. Second, this caused me a small kink in my relationship with my husband that night. I did not have food to feed him which created an uneasy situation between us. Just realizing that a food situation could affect my marriage was eye opening to the depth that food can affect me. Third, later that night I did not sleep well because I felt so awful! Through this I am reminded that Satan comes to "steal, kill, and destroy" and he is making every attempt to do this through my health!
Socially is another area that I have come to realize that food is a major factor! Most of the entertainment that we experience in our culture revolves around food! For me, going on a date, often involves, my hubby and I eating at a restaurant. Hanging out with friends, involves food to some degree, and family time is centered around food as well. For the most part, I have wrestled down our clean eating at the home, but when I step foot out of the protection of my doors, all hell breaks loose! I am tempted on every angle from the readiness of the fast food that is available to the social gatherings where it is encountered! Food is a part of life and developing a plan to encounter it socially is HUGE! It means that I have to plan to eat ahead of time or offer to bring something that is on my "good for my body" list. It means that I may have to change some of my social patterns to gather with friends and family in places other than restaurants. It means that I need to choose not to make exceptions outside my home because I am outside my home, often as much as I am in. It means that know that I have learned how to control what I do behind closed doors, I must learn to control what I do outside them.
Emotionally, oh how I am affected here! My health is so affected by my emotions because I tend to grab food when I am stressed. Something that I can do with food is continue to operate in my stressful situation while indulging myself in food. I have read suggestions such as "take a walk" or "do yoga" to help calm yourself down from a stressful situation, but the fact is, those are not ideal! I am not denying that a fair share of exercise wouldn't help me to balance out my emotional health, but in a stressful moment, I typically cannot leave, abandon my responsibility, and take a walk. This is why I have gravitated towards food to satisfy my emotional needs. I can be in the brunt of a stressful situation and have trained my brain to release endorphins when I eat food. These endorphins make grabbing food during stress so easy and convenient! So for my emotional battle, I have to again put my foot down and say that enough is enough! I have to be willing to take the hard road and change habits that are not easily changed! I have to find new endorphin releasing experiences that can coincide with the stressful situation. Several that I will pursue are diffusing oils, drinking tea, and beginning my day with a dose of Jesus and a good workout.
There is surely a reason that I have named my weight loss, a journey. It affects so many facets of my life and I knew that it certainly would not happen over night. I knew that it would take some deep soul searching for me to be able to put one foot in front of the other. There are definitely lots of hard days, but, I know that it will be all worth it when I am able to celebrating reaching each milestone that I have set!
Giving it my all,
Jess
No comments:
Post a Comment